Adoption is a journey. A journey into another land and into another life.
A journey deep into your own soul. A journey with God.
When we were called to adopt, we felt that God Himself was giving us just another glimpse of His incredible love for the world. The YEARNING to have your child home. It must be exactly how God feels until we are safely home with Him.
I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. John 14:18

It was an ordinary autumn Saturday. I went to the grocery store, loaded all the goods, and drove home. It was on that very drive home that God would forever change our lives. There was a woman on the Christian radio station talking about her adoption of a little girl named Hannah from Romania and how God used that one adoption to start a ministry known as All God’s Children International. I remember sitting in the driveway listening to her story of God’s MERCY. By the time I came into the house, the groceries were dripping – and so was I.

The very next week, I saw an ad for All God’s Children International in a Today’s Christian Woman magazine. Doug and I visited the AGCI website and wrote a letter. We reviewed and read everything. During the Christmas holidays, our entire family caught the flu. Sometimes it’s during those “flat-on-your-back” times that God can REALLY speak to your heart. It’s also the time that we read The Strength of Mercy together.

On January 17, 2000, we received a brochure from All God’s Children International featuring 14 precious little faces of children who were ready to be adopted. I sat down on the sofa to open the brochure, and there was Margarita. I was crying and shaking because I KNEW she was the one for us. I called Doug at work and told him that I found our daughter. He told me to hurry and call AGCI so that no one else thinks they found THEIR daughter, too!!! When Doug came home from work we stared at that tiny picture and marveled at what God was doing in our lives.

“Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with My righteous hand.” Isaiah 41:10
Now adoption was becoming a reality. It was not just an idea or a dream. It was happening, and we were in the middle of it! All the fear starting creeping in. How in the world were we going to be able to pay for this? We decided to do just what George Muller did when he fed and took care of hundreds of orphans.
WE WOULD PRAY. We would ask God alone to supply what we needed to adopt Margarita (who we would later re-name Anna Grace which literally means a double portion of God’s grace).

I Chronicles 17:19 O Lord, You have given me these wonderful promises just because You want to be kind to me, because of Your own great heart. O Lord, there is no one like You.
I am a “fleece thrower”. I say this to my own shame, but I need to be honest. I needed “signs” along the way. I know God always keeps His promises, but I need lots of encouragement. Though God had given me verse after verse in His Word, I still “needed” something tangible. One Sunday morning, I asked the Lord to show me just one more time that it really was His will for us to adopt Anna. This would be the sign. That someone would give me just two dollars. The entire Sunday morning passed, and it was dismissal. I went down to the preschool department to pick up our Ashleigh. A friend stopped me down in that classroom and began to cry. She said that God had miraculously blessed them with some extra money and they wanted to give us ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS toward our adoption!!! Now I was crying, too!
So do you see? God did abundantly above all that I could ever ask for. I asked for two dollars; He gave me a thousand. Isn’t that just like God???? Psalm 81:10 Open wide your mouth, and I will fill it.
That thousand dollars was just what we needed to complete our homestudy and pay the INS fee.

Deut. 1:33 …He went ahead of you on your journey…He showed you the way you should go.
The paperwork process went miraculously fast. Every doctor’s visit, police clearance, INS fingerprinting, home study – everything –went fast and smooth! There was no doubt that God Himself went before us and prepared the way. Some other really neat things happened to us as well. We could definitely sense God’s blessing and favor on us.

Isaiah 58:6-7 I want you to share your food with the hungry and bring right into your own homes those who are helpless, poor, and destitute. Clothe those who are cold.
It was 11:00 p.m. the night before I was to leave on our church’s missionary trip to Peru. The phone rang. It was Hollen, AGCI’s director of the Bulgarian program. She had just returned from Bulgaria, and wanted to share all the Anna stories. I hung onto every word as I heard her talk about this sweet little girl that was to be our daughter. She loved our gifts and our family photo album that we had sent. She knew that she was going to be adopted! For the first time ever, she had HOPE of being in a forever family.

By the time I returned from the Peru Missionary Trip, it was time to plan the Bulgarian trip. (Did I mention I had never flown in an airplane before?) You see, God really took me out of my comfort zone! The night before I left, I was at our church. I was completely overwhelmed with love and support. One person after the other handed me letters of encouragement. The 8th grade girls assembled gift bags for the orphanage workers. More money came as well ($740!) People promised to pray. Little did I know how badly I would need those prayers!

Isaiah 45:2 I will go before you and make the rough places smoothe…

Joshua 1:5 As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you. (9) Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Doug and I had been talking with another AGCI family who was also adopting a little girl from Bulgaria. Same age, same orphanage, best friends! We decided that it would be fun to fly over there together to meet our girls. After all, neither one of us really wanted to make the trip to Bulgaria alone. So Kim Canaday and I arranged the travel itinerary. I arrived at the Atlanta airport in plenty of time, but Kim did not. Her flight from Alabama to Atlanta had been cancelled, so she had to ride a bus. Time was ticking, and no sign of Kim. I started to pray. I had to board that plane. My wonderful parents bought my non-refundable ticket. Hesitantly, I got on the plane. It was soooo crowded! About 5 minutes later, I heard someone call my name. It was Kim!! Praise the Lord! It was the first time we met face to face, but we felt like we knew each other forever because of all the phone conversations.

The Lord provides AGAIN!
Psalm 66:16 Come and listen, all you who fear God; let me tell you what He has done for me
I’m telling this part of the story because I want people to see GOD at work.
I do not fly well; I get very sick. So sick, that the flight attendant suggested that I never fly again!
By the time we arrived at the Frankfurt Airport, I was so sick, and Kim was soooo sweet!
She wheeled me all over that airport until we could find a quiet place to sit. We ended up at this quaint little restaurant in the airport to have hot tea. Since we had a 7-hour layover, we decided to share the long version of our adoption experiences. When I finished telling ours, she said that she had something to tell me. God had been speaking to her husband, Eddie’s heart. He had money set aside in a Children’s Foundation that he wanted to give us – to the tune of – - – TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS!!!
I weep now even as I consider God’s love and His faithfulness to us. We are nothing and have nothing to offer Him. Yet in His amazing goodness, He continually pours out His blessings on us.

Psalm 10:18 God will be with the orphans and all who are oppressed so that mere earthly men will terrify them no longer.
Our Visits with Anna and Jordan were too precious for words. We played with them, ate with them, bathed them, fixed their hair – it was a GRAND time! At the same time, we were overwhelmed with all of the darling children in these orphanages. Truly, our hearts even felt heavy; like there was a burden inside. Neither one of us ate or slept well. We were driven to an all new level of intense prayer that God would deliver our girls – FAST! We shared a lot of time in the Bible and in prayer. Those were our only Words of comfort.
When it came time to return them to the orphanage, we were both a complete emotional wreck! There is no grief like this. Judges 10:16 He is grieved by my misery. The drive back to Sofia was long, bumpy, and quiet. So was the plane ride to Frankfurt. Leaving our girls there was the hardest thing either of us have ever done. I don’t think we’d ever recover until they were home with us in their FOREVER FAMILIES!

When the WAIT becomes a WEIGHT
Psalm 38:9 All my longings lie open before You, O Lord; my sighing is not hidden from You.
It was very difficult to be “normal” after having gone through these experiences. Seeing the world through God’s eyes – it sure makes a lot of things seem less important than they used to be. It’s also hard to be “normal” when you are waiting for your child. The WAIT becomes a WEIGHT! Because everything moved so quickly on this side of our adoption, we assumed that it would on the Bulgarian side as well. But it did not.
This is where we had to trust the Lord and His timing.
Psalm 27:10 “Though my father and mother forsake me, the Lord will receive me…(14) WAIT for the Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.
Waiting is such a hard command when the need feels so urgent! Yet, this is where we realize that God is God. He is Sovereign and in control. Nothing slows Him down, and no one thwarts His plan. His way will be accomplished His way and in His time.

God Recovers Stolen Property
Whatever the enemy steals, God alone is able to recover. This is our hope! That God will FULLY recover all that Anna has lost being “stuck in the system”. I pray for Him to restore the years that the locusts have eaten.

We Are All Adopted!
God Himself is the Author of adoption. He sent His only Son so that we could be called sons and daughters of God. We were born of this world, but now we are born into God’s family. We are His chosen heir, fully embraced into His family. “We come to God in less-than-perfect condition, scarred and hurt by our sin. We carry an orphan’s broken heart. God chooses us and offers us a place in His royal family.” We have a new name, a new heart, and a new home. Nothing is the same anymore.
Calvary was not easy, convenient, or cheap. Neither is adoption.
How great is the love the Father has LAVISHED upon us, that we should be called children of God. I John 3:1

The Pick-Up
There is nothing that can quite prepare you for the entrance of a new child into your arms, into your home, into every part of your world. This is inexpressible joy!
When I returned to Bulgaria to bring Anna to her forever family, I just couldn’t imagine what her response would be. It had been 8 months since we had met. Would she remember me? How would she feel leaving all that was familiar to her? The journey to the orphanage seemed endless; oxen carts in the roads, sheep clogging the streets, the taxi driving too slow for this anxious mother!!……when would we get there????

The children were outside playing. Since Anna knew I would be coming I RACED inside to pick up my darling. Our church had provided an enormous amount of relief that needed some explanation. The director wanted to talk. I wanted my Anna! After signing final papers, I turned around to see the SWEETEST little girl with the CUTEST smile on her face. She was wearing the heart locket I sent to her in February and the Minnie Mouse shoes I left with her when I visited in March.
I SCOOPED her up in my arms and really tried not to cry (tears of JOY!) She snuggled right into me, and we clung to one another for a long while. I set her down and put on her new clothes; a darling little dress that my friends bought for her. She was decked out like a little QUEEN!

One of the workers told me that Anna was sooooo excited that I was coming to get her, that she refused to put on her pajamas and slept in her clothes so as not to miss me when I came for her. This is when I lost it, and I could control those tears of joy no longer. My heart was just so full!!!!!! How thankful and truly overwhelmed with praise to God I was (and am!) After the final hugs and kisses and all of the “Chows” to her friends, Anna and I hopped into a little Fiat Taxi with the driver and Doc(the Bulgarian liason). We waved good-bye one last time.

Lunch with Anna was very special because we went to the SAME PLACE we had lunch when Kim Canaday and I visited in March. We sat next to the SAME table we ate at before. And Anna had the same food. It was very sweet! After lunch, we went to the same park that we played at in March. I was hoping that the memories of our first time together would help Anna put all of the pieces together. And indeed, it did! It started to rain, and Anna was wearing this gorgeous dress and shiny black shoes with white tights, so needless to say, we had to scurry from the park to the Taxi! Unfortunately, the plane back to Sofia wasn’t until 7:00. It was only 2:00. So, I had the unique opportunity of entertaining a 5-year old for 5 hours!!!!!!!! Thankfully, I had a few toys stashed in a back pack, and this did the trick. Anna has such a pleasing disposition, and she is extremely easy-going. She NEVER whined or complained or anything! She just is such a HAPPY and CHEERFUL little girl!

The plane ride back to Sofia was BUMPY. Anna loved it! She thought it was funny to go up and down and rattle!! My stomach did not think it was so funny, and once again, flying provided the sick stomach! Even in all of that, Anna just sat there like a perfect little angel! She is an unbelievable girl!

We arrived at the apartment and fell into a sweet, deep slumber. As we snuggled in the bed, Anna kept rubbing my face with her sweet little fingers. We cuddled all through the night.

I had no idea how absolutely precious the next days would be! After a somewhat peaceful night’s sleep, we woke up to the bright sunshine in Bulgaria! It was a clear, crisp morning, and my heart was full of PRAISE!

I gave Anna a nice, warm bath which she thoroughly enjoyed – even the hairwash! We got dressed, and then, she did the SWEETEST thing!!!!!!!

She put my face between her tiny little hands, and began to sing and sing. The only word I recognized was “obicham” (means LOVE). So after breakfast, when Doc arrived, I asked Anna to please sing the song again.
When Doc heard her sing, big tears streamed down his face, which made tears run down my face too! She was singing – “My dear mother, so kind and sweet, how to tell you just how much I love you!” Even now I tear up as I write this; it was such a precious moment, the kind every adoptive parent dreams for. Only I wasn’t dreaming, I was living on pure JOY!!!!!!!!

We hurried to the Poly Clinic where she received an exam from an ENT specialist, an eye specialist, and a pediatrician. Guess how much THAT cost? Just $25!!!!! Can you believe it??????? Of course, she “passed” with flying colors, and charmed them all!

Next we stopped at a photo place to get her new picture made for her transit visa. She was as good as gold!

By this time, we all needed a snack, and a bakery was just around the corner. It was very nice, and Anna and I enjoyed some wonderful quiche. (OK – we had a pastry, too!) One thing I kept noticing was how much water Anna was drinking! She drank NON-STOP! And I only offered her water so as not to cause too much stomach upset (or spoil her appetite).

Of course, we all know what happens when little kids drink LOTS of water — -so we made many trips to the restroom (she loved the toilet!) Thankfully she was great with the potty thing, and we had no accidents at
all! In fact, I brought pull-ups but only used them at night. In Bulgaria, children are “allowed” to “go” ANYWHERE (like in the grass at the park!). I just couldn’t bring myself to let her do this (especially when it’s sooooo cold!) Thankfully, there were enough bathrooms to accommodate Anna!

We did a quickie tour in Sofia, and napped for awhile that afternoon. We ate at Pizza Hut for dinner, and came back to the apt. to sleep. Once again, she LOVED her bath time! She was VERY GOOD with the toothbrushing, only she totally freaked out over the toothpaste! So we are only brushed with water, but I soon realized that kiddie-flavored toothpaste would do the trick! She does not have any cavities (none of the children in Ovcharovo do!). My dentist friend assures me that it’s the BRUSHING that counts, not the toothpaste.

Our bedtime “ritual” always consisted of singing and snuggling; both of which she LOVES. Then she plays these little games (all kids do) to try to stay up a bit longer. Mostly, she loves to rub my face and say “Obicham te” – I LOVE YOU!!!!

As I write these “Anna-Stories”, I am filled with THANKFULNESS to the Lord or blessing our family with such a PRECIOUS daughter. Everything we prayed for, He has answered – more than answered! Truly He is a God who is near the orphan!

Wednesday morning was the visit to the US Consulate Office which would grant Anna the PRIVILEGE of entering the United States of America. As many have also experienced, the line was FOREVER long. But, being a US citizen, Doc took me straight to the front of the line! I felt a bit guilty for butting in line like this, but evidently, this is the way it’s done.

I met some VERY nice people there who were sooooooo happy to grant Anna this visa. They asked me several questions, and of course, wanted to see the precious girl. When Todd (sorry I can’t remember the title – “Honorable”????) saw her, he said, “No wonder she stole your heart”. I was so thankful when he said, “Denise Cox, I will grant you this visa for Anna Grace Cox”. I teared up and said THANK YOU about a 100 times!!!!!!!!!

We did a bit more sight seeing in Sofia. Lots of old churches; lots of statues; and lots of shopping. This was really a lot of fun!!! The lace is GORGEOUS there!!! Doc encouraged me to buy Anna a Bulgarian CD of Bulgarian Children’s Songs. Boy, am I glad that I did! She loves to “dance” and sing with these songs.
I think this actually has helped her to adjust so well.

We also visited this unusual sight. There was this long trough in the downtown of Sofia filled with WARM mineral water that comes up from the earth. Scads of people were there filling up their water bottles and drinking freely from this trough. Doc INSISTED that I drink a bottle full. I was a bit squeamish as I could only think of all the germs in that warm water where the whole community was drinking!!!! But, I did manage to swallow a few sips praying the whole time that God would eradicate the germs!!!

The cutest experience of the day was when Doc and I took Anna on the escalator in the mall area. We were engaged in some conversation and just hopped on like it was nothing when all of a sudden, Anna BURST out with this deep belly-laugh. We stopped to see what was soooo funny. Then we realized that this was the first time she had ever ridden on an escalator! She loved it!

That night when I was tucking Anna in for bed, we did our ritual of singing and snuggling. Then the most amazing thing happened… Anna sang “Jesus Loves Me” – - in ENGLISH!!!!!! I guess I sang it to her enough times that she got it! Now she sings it ALL the time at home, and Doug can hardly believe how quickly she is picking up on things!

The next day we flew from Sofia to Zurich. WAY too much walking in the Zurich airport. Or was it that we carried too much stuff????????? No problem getting Anna’s papers through; no special visa or anything needed!!! We took a cab to the Hotel and tried very hard to get a good night’s rest. But the beds were as hard as boards. And the comforter STANK!!!! I have such a sensitive nose, and the smell kept waking me up in the night. YUCK! There was no bath TUB, just a shower. How would Anna react to this?????? Take a guess – she just laughed and laughed while the little sprayer thing went EVERYWHERE!!! After her “bath” the entire bathroom was SOAKED!!! We had to ask twice for extra towels, and they charged us $10 just to BORROW a hairdryer!!!!

The flight from Zurich to Atlanta was delayed – - all in all, we were on that plane for ELEVEN hours!!!!!!! And Anna stayed AWAKE the ENTIRE time. We sang, drew LOTS on the Magna-Doodle (she even learned how to make the letter “A” and all the shapes!) I also brought some beads for her to string, cups to stack, beanie babies to dress – - -all the good stuff any 5-year old girl would need.

As I mentioned before, Anna was drinking a lot of water. Now this was not a problem, but she did need to use the restroom A LOT — NINETEEN times on this flight (YES, I counted and NO, I am not exaggerating!!!!!!!) I couldn’t WAIT to get her home to meet her daddy and brother and sister (and grandparents and aunts and uncles, and friends) When our plane FINALLY landed in Atlanta, Anna exclaimed, “America!” We were all so thankful to get off of that plane! 11 hours is a very long time to be in a very small place with very limited resources with a very small child !

By now, Anna was really exhausted, but too excited to sleep. We breezed through customs and the INS Office there. EVERYONE has been soooooooo nice and encouraging to us! Of course, I think it helps that
Anna is such a charmer. How can anyone resist those darling brown eyes????

We started getting closer to waiting family and friends. I could see my dad holding a neon yellow sign which read “WELCOME HOME, ANNA”. I was SHAKING with excitement!!!!!!!!!! We began to wave to our family, and I held Anna up as high as I could! (Though she is soooo small for her age, she is still a bit “chunky”.) But you know there is that “magic line” that cannot be crossed in the airport until everything on your body has been scanned. I started throwing off all the money pouches, backpacks, neck holders – - and flung them on that scanner. We just couldn’t wait to be ALL together as a family.
Once we cleared the X-ray machine, my family could stand it no longer. They crossed the magic line, and the SWEEEEEEEEEET hugging, kissing, embracing, and TEARS OF JOY began to flow!!!!!!!
(The security guard kindly asked us to move across the “line”).

This is a joy I cannot seem to articulate. The intense feelings of togetherness and wholeness as a FAMILY.

Anna LOVES her Daddy and brother and sister, and they LOVE her!!!! Doug carried her the rest of the way in the airport, and Anna was enjoying this more than we could have imagined. The daddy she had longed for was finally hers, and she was savoring every moment with him. She was rubbing his face and then rubbing his arms. She stared at him with fierce love in her eyes. Daddy was HERS, and she wasn’t going to let go!

We spent too much time at the airport after this. My luggage was lost, and I also thought I had lost the entire adoption packet that I had soooo carefully hand-carried all the way from Sofia. By now I was totally and completely “spent”. And I just needed to get home. Thankfully, the adoption packet was discovered the next day; the luggage came a week later.

But, the most important thing is that ANNA IS HOME WITH HER FOREVER FAMILY!!!!

Anna continues to LOVE HER DADDY (I think he is her favorite (-: How can I blame her, he stole my heart, too!) Our other two children fully embrace her as a sibling, and have done very well with the whole thing!

How THANKFUL we are to the Lord for BLESSING us soooooooo abundantly!!!!!!
Truly He is an AWESOME GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!